Information Huddle

Talking to others about MS

There comes a time to reveal a difficult diagnosis to those outside the immediate family.

This can be a stressful or liberating experience. Friends may have suspected all along or been completely surprised by the information shared with them.

Revealing your diagnosis is an intimate act because you are sharing something personal with a friend in the hopes they will be supportive.

Because we cannot control others’ reactions after such a revelation, waiting until you are ready to talk is extremely important for your emotional health.

When to Say Something

First of all: you do not owe an explanation for your health. If you choose to divulge your diagnosis, that is a decision only you can make. Do not let anyone else force the matter from you.

If someone is visibly unwell and been so for a while, it may be harder to keep diagnostic information from others, particularly if treatment starts. It may be a relief in telling others because there is finally some information to share, but don’t be surprised if holding onto that information a little longer is more important.

While there might be a temptation to tell people immediately after the diagnosis, waiting until the information is processed is best. It allows for better preparation both with reactions and questions. Knowing which friends can handle the information with care and sensitivity helps in deciding who gets what information first.

But there may be some friends, despite waiting until you are ready, that may scale back the friendship because they don’t know how to handle your diagnosis. This hurts, but being ready for it will help mitigate the pain versus being blindsided. I made this mistake a few times and each time I wish I had waited to reveal my diagnosis or not bothered at all.

Only you will know the right time to divulge information, there isn’t a magic number or “best by” date to tell others.

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Personal Motivation

Advocating for Your Health


I am not a medical professional and the information provided in this post is intended for your general knowledge only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice or treatment for specific medical conditions. You should not use this information to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease without consulting with a qualified healthcare provider. Please consult your healthcare provider with any questions or concerns you may have regarding your condition.


Something is wrong.

You don’t know what it is, but something isn’t right with your body. You may not have gotten an MS diagnosis yet, but you might suspect that it’s MS or something similar.

Going to WebMD tells you one thing, but you know that self-diagnosing is not the final stopping point. You call your General Practitioner and set up an appointment to begin the investigation process.

You’ve made it this far, but what is the next step to make sure you get some answers?

Healthcare Failings

Unfortunately, simply going to the doctor isn’t going to get you an immediate answer or an answer at all. This shouldn’t discourage you from going: in fact, it should encourage you to go even more and advocate for yourself.

But it is important to go into the process prepared.

Not everyone will have a smooth experience when talking to the doctor about health issues. If you are a woman, you are more likely to be dismissed for pain complaints. MS can cause pain, as can a number of other autoimmune diseases, so walking into the office may feel like preparing for battle: will my health care professional take my complaints seriously?

The answer depends. They will hopefully jump at the chance to figure out what is going on, but some may surprise you and be resistant to exploring your situation.

This post isn’t meant to disparage the medical system, but to shed light on the possibility that you may need to engage in personal advocacy. Being an advocate is important regardless, but having tools and a contingency plan will streamline and hopefully speed up the process of getting answers and treatment.

It is important to remember this: going in with a calm attitude and willingness to listen will help disarm any potentially defensive healthcare professional, but make sure to come in with questions and ready to assert yourself for answers if necessary.

Continue reading “Advocating for Your Health”